I thought it couldn't but I guess it did...

"Odo nnyew fie kwan": the name of an African Adinkra symbol that means "love never loses it's way home". I have that tatted on my back right shoulder blade area. Now...I could lie and say the reason I got it is because I love Memphis and I plan on going back because a) that's where the love is and b) that's where my future career lies, but that's not the REAL reason. Call me dumb if you want but I got it for a reason. Me and someone "close" to me went to go get the same tattoo in the same spot on the same day at the same time. Yeah...I know...maybe not the brightest idea but hey...I guess I wasn't using my logical mind at the time. But it seemed logical to me while I was getting it...until this recent situation popped up. Now I can't say that it seems so logical because me and that "someone" no longer share the same connection due to unforeseen circumstances. Am I going to sit up and lie and say that I don't still love that girl? No. I'm not. I do. I don't think there will be any escaping that and I'll just have to learn to live with that. She came by and we talked today about this and I can honestly see her reasoning...but that doesn't mean that I necessarily agree. But then again, there is nothing that I could have possibly done to affect that decision. Yes. It hurts. A lot. But once again I say...it looks like I just have to bite the bullet because as much as I may want her back, it doesn't look like it's going to happen. It'll just be a process that when I see this girl I can't walk up to her, kiss her, and tell her I love her, but I have to substitute it with a hey, how are you, and maybe a hug at best...

This is going to be a long process so...while I'm dealing with this...I'm going to keep asking the same thing..."God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Amen.

p.s. It's probably going to be a long night so don't be surprised if you see more than one blog go up tonight...(if you read them anyway...)